They say confession is good for the soul. We’ll see because tonight I have a confession to make.
I AM BORED WITH CHURCH!!
I am a licensed preacher – I’ve been preaching for going on 5 years now and I must confess – I am bored…utterly… and almost completely with church. I’m not talking about my church. I’m talking about “church” – the institution. I appreciate and celebrate the presence of my church family. I like checking up on the youth to see how they are doing. I value spending quality time with the mothers of the church and my “big brother” deacons, but I am bored with the routine, and tradition of waking up Sunday after Sunday – putting on a uniform, sliding on my strained smile face and going to yet another exercise in standardized religiosity. Is there more to Sunday mornings than this?
Today was a particularly bad Sunday in that I was not motivated to get up and go to church today. Now I admit, I was tired from staying up to catch the interviews from the Roy Jones/Antonio Tarver fight, but even if I was well rested – it would’ve been hard to get up this Sunday morning just like its been hard to get up for the past couple months (and probably past couple of years) of Sunday mornings. I got to church late…probably late on purpose and I sat in the back. Not wanting to stroll in late and ease my way up to the pulpit. I left before the benediction, came home ate breakfast and went back for round 2. For what? That’s probably at the source of what I’m feeling now – FOR WHAT? It’s become increasingly difficult for me to ascertain the purpose of these gatherings. Mind you – since seminary I have grown to a place where I am understanding more and more that the theology that I primarily embrace and the theology of my church isn’t too much in stride with one another, however, I’ve grown past that. (for the most part) So beyond the theology – I’m in the process now of trying to find an answer to the “FOR WHAT?”
One of my Union brothers reminded me of a book we read in seminary entitled The Wounded Healer by Henri Nouwen. I began re-reading this book yesterday and I came across this wonderful passage on page 36. It says:
The generation to come is seeking desperately for a vision, an ideal to dedicate themselves to – a “faith,” if you want. But their drastic language is often misunderstood and considered more a threat or a sturdy conviction than a plea for alternative ways of living.
A truly insightful passage – written in 1970 mind you. I think that quote is very necessary to include here though especially for those who truly love “church” and consider my words an attack on something that they love so dear. While on occasion I can be arrogant and haughty; at this moment I’m very sensitive to where others might be. I respect the fact that some of you reading this right now love everything about church and wouldn’t change a thing. However, that’s not where I am in my journey.
I’m convinced that if church doesn’t at least consider alternative ways of being – then dangerous amounts of “churched” [read conditioned] youth and young adults will begin questioning out loud the purpose and direction of the local assembly choosing rather to seek ways to connect with God without the cumbersome weight of unexamined weekly routine. [READ: "Detoxing from Church" by Jason Zahariades - a great article exploring aspects of this issue]
Dr. Vincent Harding, a wise man who I admire greatly advised me and my Young Clergy for Social Change friends to balance our critique of what’s wrong with the creation of alternatives so I’m going to be very “baptistic” and propose 3 potential alternatives for the church – don’t worry I won’t “whoop” at the end. (of course these won’t be one-size fits all solutions, but at least something to ponder)
1. Cancel all early morning and early evening worship experiences. In this fast-paced, stressful, and highly intense society, we need more time for family. Many adults work 40+ hours a week leaving little time for their children. As a youth minister, one of the most common things that I recognize as negative factors in the lives of the youth that I serve is parental neglect. Not neglect of food, clothes, and shelter so much as loving attention and care. Can early Sunday mornings be set aside as family time…time for families to sit down and eat breakfast together with the TV off? And can Sunday afternoon/early evening be times for mothers to walk around the block with daughters and fathers to throw the football with sons? And for those who are single and don’t have families to spend time with – they can just rest. A pastor friend of mine says that you can always tell who the Christians are on Monday morning because they are the ones with big ol’ bags under their eyes and bodies just limping along. Why do we have to be in church all day long?
2. Dedicate at least one Sunday every month for some type of Outreach activity. Cancel your 11am service and encourage the church family to come together and serve outside of the four walls together. Some people are intimidated by the idea of walking the pavement and shaking hands of strangers by themselves, but if Pastor, Deacons, youth, and trustees are all going then outreach becomes an easier pill to swallow. What type of outreach you ask? Volunteer at a soup kitchen/homeless shelter or create Family Meal Sunday – go to a very impoverished neighborhood and set up tables, burners, and chairs in one of those abandoned parking lots or parks. Turn some music on, have some games for the kids and just have fun. I think that monthly outreach activities would go a long way in rebuilding the damaged bridge between church and community. Exploring ways to establish relationships with community advocacy groups, rehab centers, and/or schools in the community should be included in your monthly Outreach Sundays as well.
3. AND ON THE THIRD DAY HE GOT UP WITH ALL POWER ALLLLLL POOOOWEEERRR – oh sorry. The “baptist” in me got a little out of hand. I said I wouldn’t “whoop”.
The real #3: Start a mentoring program at the church. Fortunately, many churches already have youth mentoring programs and I consider them a real blessing. Our young people would benefit greatly from the opportunity to spend time with a caring adult who knows when to speak and when to listen. I’ve only been a youth minister for about 5 years, but Lord knows I have some stories to tell – from drunk teens calling me before they think they’re about to have sex, to depressed youth contemplating suicide, to young guys scared out of their minds because their girl is pregnant – I bare witness that some of our teens encounter some pretty traumatic experiences. A mentoring program would go a long way in helping to bring stability and encouragement to the life of a youth. However, I don’t think mentoring should stop with the youth – Adults needs mentors too. Young married couples could be mentoring by older married couples, young singles could be mentored by older singles, etc. Mentoring presents a mutually beneficial opportunity to establish a relationship and “show” Christ without having to pass out your tracks, quote scripture all day, or speak in tongues. (If you’re interested in staring a quality, sustainable youth mentoring program let me know – that’s my current profession).
So those are just 3 of my suggestions – do I have more? NO DOUBT, but that’s all I’m giving up right now. I’m sure that you might have some to add to the list or perhaps by now you’re convinced that I’m crazy and that if I would just come to your church everything would be okay.
Whichever way you feel about it, this confession has made me feel better…that is –at least until next Sunday.
Goodnight.
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This is a very interesting essay. It started out as a confession and it finished up as a suggestion. So in keeping with the format I too have a confession to make. I too was bored. I was tired of the routine. So, I left church I’m not talking about my church. I’m talking about “church” – the institution. I stopped being traditional. I realized I could not get fired from church,. I figured out that my theology (my understanding of the nature of God and religious truth) would in no way be compromised by the anthropology (That part of Christian theology concerning the genesis, nature, and future of humans) of the church. I decided to give my sunday mornings more than the “this” you wrote about.
I appreciate the reference to Nouwen. I read him a couple of times. I also suggest another bbok by Nouwen which may shed more light on the “this,” “In the Name of Jesus: Reflections on Christian Leadership.”
Well, I beter get to the suggestion portion of the motif.
Why don’t you do like the original wounded healer and take your butt out of the church and do what you suggest.
1.Cancel your worship experiences. Perhaps take your disciples er…I mean Young Clergy for Social Change and spend time with families that don’t know they should spend time together at all.
2. You, YCSC, and your youth ministry could dedicate one sunday a month to outreach. Cancel yourself from 11 am service.
3. IF HE GOT UP WITH POWER IN HIS HANDS . THEN YOU… THEN YOU… THEN YOUUUUUUUU.. HAVE THE SAME POWER IN YOUR HANDS… SAY YEAH!!!
Oops I got caught up. I guess I gave away that i am a batist preacher too.
The real #3. You probably already have a mentoring program in your church. So my final suggestion is first check with
your disciples and make sure they have mentoring programs in their churches. Then go to the churches of the people you have met in your five years of ministry and offer to help them. and go to the other churches around your church and offer to help them, and go tohe churches around those churches and offer to help them and… shucks you get the drift. You could even do this on sunday.
So those are 3 of my suggestions.
Do I have more? NO!
Are you crazy? NO!
Should you come to my church? NO.
We already have enough people confessing and suggesting.
When you are ready to leave from the church and go out and do something put it up on this blog and I will join you.
LOL
P.S. Have you ever tried to get the church (the institution) to help a poor family bury their loved one?
Now this is what blogging is for!
Thank you anonymous, laughing, baptist preacher for your very thoughtful and insightful comments.
It’s not easy to make public, my private struggles, however, the reward of practical and brutally honest advice is very much so appreciated.
While I can’t cancel Sunday morning worship – you’re right – perhaps I can organize a day for me and the youngins to “cancel ourselves” once a month to serve others.
YCSC is…well – sometimes hot sometimes not. There’s definitely more organizational structure and development necessary, but I can at least put it out there to them. (Which I and others have tried to do repeatedly)
And the mentoring program is coming together nicely. We already have a female mentoring program and in a couple months the male mentoring program will begin.
Again – I appreciate the comments and you’ll get an update soon.
Thanks for the heads up on the other Nouwen book. I’ll pick it up.
And by the way – YOU ARE HILARIOUS! LOL
Take care.
About the Church
After reading a little of what was being said from folks and their opinions of the church, I figured I’d address a few things that we all can think about.
1. The Church as we know it, is not the church that Jesus left. It’s a far cry from what He intended it to be. Jesus didn’t establish a political presence, He wasn’t trying to create a centerpiece for a particular ethnic group, and He certainly wasn’t attempting to attract the masses with gimmicks or emotional indulgences designed to excite them. What Jesus left was a gateway to the presence and power of the Almighty God for all who’d dare to approach Him. Jesus lived a certain way while He walked on the earth, and He expects ALL who’d follow Him to personally and collectively (as the church) duplicate that.
2. There is no evidence of Him in the modern church. Ask yourself this question: How do I know that the church I attend is the “House of God?” Well, how can someone tell that you’re at your house? Easy: WHEN THEY COME, THEY’LL SEE PROOF THAT YOUR THERE! So, what I’m trying to say is…. If the glory of God is never revealed in a place, then God isn’t there! Now, that doesn’t mean that the church should close up shop. It simply means that the gatherers should be diligently seeking to find the One who supposedly lives there. Otherwise, our faith is in vain. Jesus was very specific when He stated what works believers would accomplish in His name (Mark 15.) His statement was very clear: These signs will follow them that believe… If there are no signs, how do you know you’re going in the right direction?! Because we rationalize and reason the absence of the signs, we can justify the current state of Ichabod.
3. Jesus was not a social activists. Jesus did not come to make Himself king in the natural sense. As a matter of fact, Paul commands the Christian not to entangle himself with the affairs of this life so that he could please Him who had chosen the Christian to be a soldier (2 Tim. 2.) God brought about a measure of social equity through Martin Luther King, but that doesn’t mean that God bore witness with who he was. The stature of Kings legacy is strong politically, but was Jesus Christ and the Kingdom of God established? How about Malcolm, or Rosa, or Evers? Nope. Other than his church affiliation and theological scholarship, King is not historically associated with Jesus or the gospel. There was no revival, repentance, nor righteousness brought about by his labors. So, God can use us to bring about a desired end just like with Judas, or we can be used like Peter (who bridged social gaps by obedience to the Holy Spirit. Acts 10) 2 Chr. 7:14 gives the believer an accurate blueprint for how we’re are to respond to a society in peril.
4. The Holy Spirit draws men. It’s not our wealth, race, culture, strategy, eloquence, or social stature that draws, keeps, disciples, and transforms men. According to the second chapter of Acts, that’s the Holy Ghost’s occupation. When He’s not in the equation then, yes, church will be boring. And why wouldn’t it be? Without Him, we’d attend this big building without purpose. Would you go to McDonald’s if they ran out of food? No! Think about what the synagogues were like during that 400 year period of God’s silence… They had to fake it! They weren’t being spoken to by the very Lord who freed them from bondage time and again! The ark of the covenant was gone, yet they still had a veil covering the holy of holies! That sounds to me like our modern church! Since the Presence of God is gone, we mask it by pomp and circumstance. We dance and shout and faint and sell out jam-packed stadiums, but the city is no better for it. Yet, 120 people in a little upper room revolutionized the world. Why? Timing? Or could it have been that they had access to the same thing that we trivialize?
5. In Conclusion. Instead of pondering whether we should take off a Sunday morning or evening church service to build a better relationship with the family, why don’t we take off from work or keep the kids home from school for a day, every now-and-then? For surely work and school aren’t higher on our priority list than the assembling of ourselves (and this might be shocking) to worship God, who’s good and whose mercy endures forever. Praise and Worship is not for us… It’s for the King. In order to make church more “interesting,” we must:
a. Begin to fast and pray for the Lord to return to our empty buildings for real
b. Study the life of Jesus and desire to fulfill His plans for the world
c. Make our calling and election sure (find out who you are in Christ Jesus) because each man is chosen to be a different gift to the work of the ministry.
d. Go after Jesus, deny ourselves, take up our crosses (spiritual responsibilities that have social impact) and follow Him
e. Make a decision to die to something you got from the world each day
Only then will we (as American’s, ’cause I bet those persecuted overseas churches, who flow in the fullness of God’s power and love aren’t bored with church) find the Guest of Honor in the sanctuary (aka. Immanuel).
God’s Grace…
So, I was reading this entry at the beginning of the week, and was able to see that I too am bored with the church, but the magnitude of my boredom didn’t really hit me until I saw the poll. I was forced to ask myself how I would respond. Naturally, I wanted to say I’m content at my church, but the reality is I’m “not really satisfied” and I’d venture to say that I’m “not satisfied at all”. This doesn’t mean that I don’t love my church, it simply means that I’m tired of being in an environment where the birthing process has ceased. The church members don’t see the importance of bearing fruit and fulfilling the Great Commission. People are more concerned with who sings the solo on the choir, and less concerned with lives being saved through the songs the choir sings.
But more than the members of the church being deadbeat, for me, the biggest struggle has been getting my pastor to stop talking the good talk and letting it end there. (At times I don’t even think my pastor realizes this is what’s happening.) Every once in a while, church members need to see the pastor get out of their fancy car and their designer suits and take a faith walk in an effort to change the community. (I’m not saying preachers/pastors should not have nice cars and nice clothes, please do not misinterpret that statement.) What good is it to talk about reaching out to the community and talk about the new outreach ministries that we are “going” to develop if time after time we say this and nothing happens? I appreciate your suggestions, and I think I may have to forward your entire entry to my pastor because if pastors in Baltimore and all over don’t soon wake up, the younger generation will be gone. The way we do church must change, the message must not change, but the vehicle in which we carry the message has got to change.
I wish to respond to the rsponses.
1. Jesus did not leave a church for us read your bible translated from the Greek. On this rock I will build my assembly (that is a group of people). Not a building. He did establish a political presence he was crucified for sedition and insurrection.
2. What is this undefined “glory of God?”
3. Jesus spoke up for women’s rights. He who is with out sin…
As a man I find him turning over tables in the temple. I find him doing what he did everywhere but in the temple his ministry occurs away from the estabishment.
I digress. Constantines Christianity was established on the heels of a vision that helped him and his men kill the people they were fighting. Christ on the other hand died for his cause.
4. Where have you been under the rock.
yes, the Holy Spirit does draw men. But so does wealth, race, culture, strategy, eloquence, or social stature keep disciples, and transforms men. Have you seen MTV Cribs. It seems every body blessed got something. God blessed me with a big car, house, money.
There was no 400 years of silence of God. Go to the synagogogue and ask them to teach you about the Hammer,(he is not a WWE wrestler).
In conclusion, you need to shut it down.
LOL
the real Anonymous–>